March 12th, 2010 by
smith
I have always been a stay at home mom up until 5 months ago when I started back at work nursing the shifts can be long
I love my job and but my home is falling apart ....
The house work/washing never seams to be caught up on and my 2 days off I spend cleaning !!!
my kids are 13 11 and 9yrs old and I know they should be helping out but half the time its more stress full arguing with them about it and I just end up doing it myself .... I feel like I have no time to spend with them and don't want to lose track of how school is ect .. I need a rota I think or a new tight routine .....
What are your routines ? any tips would be appreciated to get some order and peace back into my home :-)Hi there, someone asked a similar question last week she had about 5 replys i will try to send her site question so you can see her answers
hope they work. Also one person said to watch a show called house behaving badly, but havent checked it out
http://au.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind...You need to get the kids involved i think. I mean, when i was younger i used to help my mum doing all the chores and although i didnt have to wash my own clothes, or cook at 10 years old,i could have. Its important to get them involved at this stage as it will make for better wifes/husbands in the future. Why not sit them down and have a chat, say that you are very tiered and want to do fun things with them when you are at home and if they help, even a little then it saves you time and you can be with them. My jobs when i was younger by the way:- clean my room-hoover and dust and put the dishwasher away every day and as my mum was a bit of a clean freak dust the front room in the eve. Not a great sacrifice on my part really seeing as i always had clean clothes, a warm house, home cooked meal. Good luck.Karen, it is already too late in the day to try to resolve this question. It is obvious that when the children were very young, they were not involved in helping around the house, helping with the cooking, the washing -up, dusting and general cleaning. Your eldest is 13yrs, the 11 and 9 year olds are obviously using him as their mentor and follow his example. So now you want to involve the children, but for the wrong reasons, to do the housework, but they have never been involved before and they are certainly not going to do it now. Hence all the arguement created when they are asked. I brought up 4 children, and they were all involved whenit came to doing the chores. When they could not reach the kitchin sink, they stood on a chair, they helped with cooking in their own little way, and yes we had a rota, for washing, drying, and putting away. Firm but fair, is the best policy and it has shown results. Shouting and screaming at them when they now refuse, only serves to exacerbate the problem. Asking nicely and offering rewards may still work with the younger ones, but the older one would be embarrassed, and maybe teased by his friends if he is seen to be doing housework. Unfortunately this is how it is today. Be a parent and put your foot down. Your children need to help you. if they dont then dont do their clothes. Once they dont have any clothes to wear to school, they will figure out how to turn the washing mchine on. My mother did that to me when i was younger and it taught me to be more responsible with the chores around the house.First let me say what a trooper you are! A nurse and three kids under 14. That is hard work before you even start to add housework into the equation.
Stop trying to be Superwoman for a start and be prepared to let standards slip a bit. No one ever died from having a messy house.
As a nurse you know clean is better than tidy so try to make that your main aim.
You do not mention your husband/partner in all this. If you have one make sure he does his part too. If the kids see everyone knuckling down they are more likely to help out.
The 13 and 11 year old are quite capable of doing their bit. I would be less reliant on the 9 year old as that is a little young to accept responsibility for anything.
Have a family meeting....
Try and allocate particular tasks to be done on particular days to each child. Have you taught your children how to use the washing machine? The 13 year old should be quite capable.
Each should be responsible for their own rooms and be told a length of time that they are expected to clean it. Put the oldest child in charge of making sure the other two get on with theirs.
Simple things like collecting dirty cups, glasses etc. from rooms can be a great help to you. Sorting washing is fun if done properly. They can all help with that. The oldest could be responsible for clearing away the washing up and given a treat in return...extra time with you for doing it!
Explain to your children that you going to work means extra money coming in to pay for all the things they need and want so helping you out is of benefit to them.
If all else fails get a cleaner one day a week. With the extra money you are bringing in you can afford this one little luxury :)Maybe try this... draw a chart on a piece of paper, with days of the week across the top and chores to do down the side. Then decide with your children who will do which chores. You could photocopy the sheet and whichever child does the best with their chores gets a treat at the end of the week. That will teach your kids that hard work leads to reward, which is an invaluable lesson
You could do the chart on the computer and print it out if that's easier. But pin it on the fridge or somewhere where they can always see it, so that they cant forget about the chores#If you have any other info about this subject , Please add it free.# |
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